Well, I've changed again.

I haven't been very satisfied with the Wal-Mart Connect internet service I signed up for a good while back. The proprietary browser is horrible to use and and goofy-looking to boot, and the access has been terribly unreliable for the past few months, and there's just too much Compuserve/AOL crappery involved in working with it.

So, I have jumped over to PeoplePC. I didn't really do any research or anything, but I like their little stick-man ads on teevee. I got all signed up last night, and then called the Wal-Mart customer "service" number (apparently in a call center on the outskirts of Mumbai) to cancel my service.

The inevitable question came up about why I wanted to cancel (at least, that's what I think she asked me), and one problem I mentioned was that the access numbers often don't work, and that I have been getting kicked off with increasing frequency. After a run-together mishmash of vowels and consonants, I was able to discern she was asking what OS I was using.

"XP."

"Oooooh!WelltheWindow versionyouuse,itnogoodforconnectingbecause itnotlaterwithup datecodeyouhave toputin codemakeit workrightnowyou stilluseWalMartConnect? Okay?"

"Ma'am, I just want to cancel my service." I said this very nicely. And slowly.

Round Two of "Why The Service Sucks, Is the Customer's Fault." She rattled on and on about some discrepancy between the way stuff on the computer talks to the newest versions of Windows, and I interrupted her bitstream to tell her it was messing up when I was using 98, and that it worked fine when I first started using the service but recently has gotten pretty crappy so she kept hammering and finally paused.

"Okay?"

"No, ma'am--I just want you to cancel my account."

From what I can tell, I still have WallyWorld service through the end of April. Or not. I think I can continue to use it (as if I actually wanted to) through April. Or not.

I finally said my goodbyes, and she said goodbye, and I thought the call was through. I held for a second expecting to hear a click on the other side, but none came. I did hear some coughing in the background, then, "ALLOSIR?" Why was she still hanging on the line!? I guess they just take calls one after another as soon as someone hangs up, but it was awfully disconcerting.

So I asked her what she was wearing.

(Not really, but I have wanted to do that to telemarketers before.)

Anyway, just to make sure I actually was cancelled, I called the number again this morning and talked to a guy I think was named Bob Smith (there's probably a whole lot of those on the outskirts of Bangalore) who did confirm after many minutes of rapidly run-together conversation that my account was cancelled.

Hooray.
posted by Terry at 10:43:00 AM