Hey, forget about them dumb marmots--It's POSSUM DAY!

Stupid ugly rodent gets all the attention every year. You know the best thing about Groundhog Day? Andie MacDowell.

Anyway, Possum Day occurs every February 2 at exactly one minute past midnight, when it is said that if the possum sees his his shadow by the light of the moon as he is crossing the road, and does not get run over by a car, there will be three and a half more weeks of somewhat dry weather, followed by intermittent showers, and lower than normal temperatures. If he doesn't see his shadow, and does get hit by a car, it's just kind of normal and doesn't really mean anything. If he sees his shadow and only manages to get scared by a car to the point of feigning death, it means there will be 39 more days of really cold weather, but no snow, except for places where it usually snows. If he doesn't see his shadow, AND manages to cross the road safely, BUT eats something on the other side of the road that makes him sick, it means that it's best not to make any plans for the end of March/early April that involve water-skiing.

Official pronouncements of the results of Possum Day come to us, as they have for the last 215 years, from Noogerville, Alabama, home of the most famous Possum Day possum, Noogerville Ned.

NOOGERVILLE, AL (PBNS)--At this year's raucous Possum Day ceremony, which was attended by several people, the Governor of the Possum Day Board of Assemblymen, Sven Liggenssohn, read aloud from a specially prepared piece of paper that came from Traci-Ann Ponanner's math notebook.

To horrified gasps from the clutch of spectators, it was announced that Noogerville Ned had been eaten by a bobcat who had managed to get into his pen, and nothing at all could be determined regarding any prediction he might have been able to make, had he remained in an uneaten state.

Fingers are now being pointed at those who were in charge of security for the event, including Noogerville mayor Barbara-Ann Nooger, who had no comment. Her husband, Jim, is quoted as saying he did not care one way or the other what happened to Ned, but he was rather concerned for his own safety when going to and from the couple's mailbox, given that there is a bobcat in the area.

Happy Possum Day to you all!
posted by Terry at 8:17:00 AM