Possumblog

Not in the clamor of the crowded street, not in the shouts and plaudits of the throng, but in ourselves, are triumph and defeat.--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

REDIRECT ALERT! (Scroll down past this mess if you're trying to read an archived post. Thanks. No, really, thanks.)

Due to my inability to control my temper and complacently accept continued silliness with not-quite-as-reliable-as-it-ought-to-be Blogger/Blogspot, your beloved Possumblog will now waddle across the Information Dirt Road and park its prehensile tail at http://possumblog.mu.nu.

This site will remain in place as a backup in case Munuvia gets hit by a bus or something, but I don't think they have as much trouble with this as some places do. ::cough::blogspot::cough:: So click here and adjust your links. I apologize for the inconvenience, but it's one of those things.


Friday, March 26, 2004

Kerry promises to create 10 million jobs

In addition, JFKLitetm promises:

1) A free lifetime supply of Heinz ketchup in handy single-serve pouches for every American.

2) To capture Osama bin Laden, try him, convict him, and send him to a nice halfway house in Boston where he can talk to other maniacal nihilists and convince them of the error of their ways.

3) To repeal gravity so Secret Service agents will quit falling on him as he skis, thus insuring he will not be forced to use Executive Potty Mouth Privilege.

4) To finally admit that he indeed did serve in Viet Nam.

5) To fight to insure that all Americans have a butler. And an AMERICAN butler, too! None of those offshore, outsourced ones!

6) To once more make the world love America, just like it did...well, never, but that's beside the point. We'll be the most popular kids in school! Germany and France will be clamoring to dance with us at the party, and all those weird swarthy kids will quit calling us names! It'll be kewl!

7) To be gracious in defeat should he lose in November. (Yeah, I know--that's obviously made up.)


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