What a day.

I am tired--I have been typing on and off for nearly five hours, and what do I do? Get on the silly Blogger wire and start typing some more! Moron.

Anyway, as I mentioned, I got myself up and went to gather up our earnings. Nate McCord wrote me a message and asked why I didn't do direct deposit. Good question--it all has to do with the near continual horror stories of misrouted paychecks from my lovely workplace. Mr. Bank and Mr. Credit Card and Mr. Telephone and Mr. Gas and Mr. Water and Mr. Sewer and Mr. Cell Phone and Mr. Reddy Kilowatt and a host of other people already GOT their checks, and they are now coming back to Mr. Credit Union, which means that Mr. Possum MUST RELY ONLY ON HIMSELF to get the loot into the account at least a minute or two before the other stuff starts clearing--I simply can't take the chance of a snafu. And, whatever's left over I go blow on whiskey, cigarettes, and betting on the pups. (Not really.)

So, to town, on autopilot most of the way thinking of how incredibly chilly it seemed this morning. Quite a bit of snap. Brisk, I would say. Enough nip to have put on my long johns this morning, which will later form the basis for A Learning Experience™.

Until that time, though, I found myself stuck in an odd amount of backed up traffic in the lane going to the 22nd Street exit ramp. It was around 9:30, yet it was backed up like rush hour--hmmm. Oh, wait, there's a wreck. Thus starts the process of trying to get around the thing by having to pull out into the adjacent lane and dodge traffic that is going 122 miles per hour. (There is no emergency lane, which is a Bad Thing.) Carefullllll--NAIL IT!!!!!!!! I slammed out and got around the clog, which was three vehicles with a variety of people talking into their hands, and then, another one--two cars, and just as I was about to get back over, ANOTHER one! Three separate wrecks within the space of an eighth mile--what in the worl...oh. Oh.

It's the friggin' circus.

I mentioned Wednesday about the dog trainer guy, and had forgotten that today was the opening day for The Greatest Show On Earth, and that there was a matinee. The exit to the convention center was clogged with school buses and a line of moms and tots from the hinterlands whose only trip into downtown Birmingham is to come to the circus. And who, if they manage not to collide with someone, are blissfully unaware that the exit ramp, although narrow, IS capable of holding two cars abreast.

Two cars side by side can navigate the ramp almost TWICE as fast as one with a single lane. Imagine that! However, a single file line of cars with people who don't have the foggiest idea of where they are going OTHER than to the circus moves ONE THIRTY-SECOND as fast as normal. It took me THIRTY MINUTES to get from the ramp to my office. Not that I didn't try. I moved in beside two blondes from the fringe in a Toyota Highlander who looked at me as if I was Ghenghis Khan--they were totally baffled that anyone would dare think that this thirty foot wide slab of concrete could actually hold TWO vehicles! A girl in a car ahead of me was obviously a regular--we kept trying to stay to one side and do a vehicular pantomime to convince people to double up. Nope. No go. Everyone else stayed right there in the middle. ::sigh::

Into the office, swap pleasantries with folks, note a roll of drawings in my mailbox, pick up my notes from my Wednesday meeting, get my check, and back out. I then swung by and picked up Reba's check--the receptionist didn't quite recognize me at first--I usually come by all neat and clean and combed, but today I had on my big field coat and ratty jeans and my Hewitt sweatshirt and an Auburn baseball cap holding down my wild, Cosmo Krameresque pile of wild unkempt hair. Ee-yew. But they gave me her money and it was off to the credit union, and then back to Trussville. Homeward was much less traumatic and I was able to go on autopilot again.

Stopped off at Winn Dixie and got some condiments for lunch and batteries for the Thermoscan--gotta have that with all the sick kids. Got home and guess what?

Yep, Oldest Girl had decided she could no longer do homework, and had to take a nap. ::sigh:: She managed to sleep the REST OF THE DAY. Anything to avoid doing what she knows she has to do. Grr. On the other hand, Middle Girl was up and about and after we ate lunch, she played computer games the rest of the day while I typed up my minutes.

As I mentioned, in amongst all of this fun, I had a profound learning experience. As I said at the top, today was a long-handle day. I have an old waffle weave pair that I have had nearly twenty years. Don't gasp--it so rarely gets cold enough to wear them that they last a long, long time. Long enough for a man to forget that when nature calls, there is more than two layers of fabric that must be peeled away in order to release the horsie from the barn--to allow the snake to drain--to put out the fire-- And that when you really have to do all these things, and your zip-flip rhythm is throw out of kilter by not one, not two, but THREE SEPARATE FLIES, you can sometimes get into that desperation mode, in which you dance about like Michael Flatley, deftly stomping your feet and flailing about your crotch when you realize that you AREN'T READY! Luckily, I made it. Barely. And learned a lesson that will be forgot as soon as the longjohns go back in the drawer.

The rest of the afternoon was normal stuff, went and got the little kids from school, got home and noticed our new neighbors sure had a lot of water pouring out of the side of their house and from under their garage door. Bursted water line. Poor kids--they're a young couple and just moved in a month ago. I ran over and their garage was locked and then went and rang the doorbell while trying my best to keep Catherine from braining herself on the ice slick concrete driveway. No one home, so I sent my kids inside and got my handy pair of Vise Grips and went back out and turned their water off at the meter, then left them a note about what I had done. Makes me worry, because our kitchen sink cold water was frozen this morning, and I surely don't need another bill to pay.

Reba got home and we had a nice supper of much-craved-for Chinese food, then it was back to working on my pay-producing drudgery, and then this.

As I said, I am tired.

So, have yourself a good weekend, stay warm, and I will see you on Monday.
posted by Terry at 12:41:00 AM