Possumblog

Not in the clamor of the crowded street, not in the shouts and plaudits of the throng, but in ourselves, are triumph and defeat.--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

REDIRECT ALERT! (Scroll down past this mess if you're trying to read an archived post. Thanks. No, really, thanks.)

Due to my inability to control my temper and complacently accept continued silliness with not-quite-as-reliable-as-it-ought-to-be Blogger/Blogspot, your beloved Possumblog will now waddle across the Information Dirt Road and park its prehensile tail at http://possumblog.mu.nu.

This site will remain in place as a backup in case Munuvia gets hit by a bus or something, but I don't think they have as much trouble with this as some places do. ::cough::blogspot::cough:: So click here and adjust your links. I apologize for the inconvenience, but it's one of those things.


Friday, November 15, 2002

Finally, someplace my talents might be of use...

World's biggest liar to defend title

LONDON (Reuters) - The World's Biggest Liar will defend his title against a small but devious group of challengers in a pub in northern England later today.

George Kemp beat five-time winner John Graham last year with a string of tall tales including one about his grandfather's greyhound which he said stopped in the middle of a race to have pups and then went on to win, followed by the puppies.

This year's eight entrants will meet for dinner in the Bridge Inn, Santon Bridge in the picturesque Lake District to limber up with a few pints of ale before going head to head with their lies.

"They put their names in a hat and are picked out one by one," pub manager Teresa Appleton told Reuters by telephone. "Each one then has five minutes to tell a pack of lies."

A panel of six judges sits through the performances and then retires to consider its verdict.

The winner gets the princely sum of 25 pounds in cash, a tie proclaiming them the World's Biggest Liar and a silver cup they can keep for a year.

"The competition is tough. They all keep their lies a strict secret until the night," organiser Ian Congdon said. "We are looking for originality, delivery and humour."

The competition, which attracts interest from around the world, was inspired by 19th century Bridge Inn landlord Will Ritson who kept his customers entertained with fictitious tales about the surrounding area.
Bunch of amateurs, and Limeys to boot! Whenever you fellers pick one, send him on over here and let him get his comeuppance. I'll even pay for his airplane ticket and hotel room.

Well, well, an UPDATE: World's Biggest Liar fends off opposition
LONDON (Reuters) - The World's Biggest Liar has kept his title for a second year, fending off competitors at a northern pub by boasting of his exploits on a wooden motorcycle.

George Kemp, 35, told how he rode a balsa wood motorcycle to victory at the Isle of Man TT race, stopping to take advice from formula one driver Nigel Mansell who was walking his dog on the course.

"It was very tight this year," competition organiser Ian Congdon said by phone from the Bridge Inn, Santon Bridge, where competitors were still noisily celebrating. "It could have gone any way between two or three people."

One competitor boasted of how he had disproved a theory that French Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte had only one testicle, while another told of an expedition to Africa where he had met Elvis Presley.

In second place was former five-time winner John Graham, who was stripped of his crown last year by Kemp with the tale of his grandfather's greyhound, which gave birth to pups in the middle of a race before going on to win, followed by the puppies.

"The entrants try very hard to keep a straight face," said Congdon. "They're judged on delivery, humour -- anything that keeps you entertained, and George certainly did that."[...[
A bloody wooden motorcycle and prissy Nigel!?! THAT'S ALL YOU GOT!? Please. My offer still stands--get on over here and let's have at it, Georgie.


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