For your momentary diversion

It's going to take a while to recreate the memories of this weekend, so rather than make you hungrily wait for drivel, I figured a nice trip into the referrer logs would give you something to chat amongst yourselves about.

First up--we had a hardy visitor in here earlier looking for photos of thick trailer trash ladies.

Admittedly, Possumblog is a very eclectic sort of assemblage of stuff, but I don't have any photos here. Just remember, dear person, in your searching don't ever refer to a 'thick trailer trash lady' as a double-wide. And wouldn't you really rather be looking for pictures of Jane Russell, who never lived in a trailer? I thought so.

Next up, in a similar sort of line of inquiry, some sicko came here looking for ted kennedy waistline fat pictures. Again, no pictures here, but more importantly, shouldn't you really be seeking out the services of one of the fine mental health professionals in your area? I think so. By the way, Jayne Kennedy never drove a car into the Chappaquiddick River.

Third, someone who knows how sympathetic and caring I can be: un happey need job on island. Well, if you're un happey, getting a job's not gonna make it better! You need to win the lottery and BUY your own island! Then it will all be better. Promise.

Next up, someone obviously looking to help out a youngster with homework--Bernouilli's Principle for kids. Well, first off, I think it's supposed to be "Bernoulli", but I misspelt it in a much earlier post. Obviously not the best way in the world to do spell check, but I promise I will clear it up in a bit.

NOW THEN, on to the burning question. The thing you have to remember with kids is that they speak a totally different language, and if you want to have great success with them, it always helps to use their own slang and attitude. It makes you look youthful and vigorous and they will accept you as one of their peers! So, in explaining Bernoulli's Principle, the best thing to do is say, "It sucks." Then add the word "dude" at the end.

Sticking with our theme of science, there is this inquiry--does hairspray destroy the ozone.

Obviously, it's not just Hairspray, but all Broadway shows--including favorites such as 42nd Street, The Boy from Oz, and basically anything that talks about reproductive organs--all combine to create horrible damage to the atmosphere and our environment. And, it's not just a problem in New York City, but in countless community and dinner theaters all across the country. What can you do to help? First, realize that the money spent on mounting these extravaganzas would be much better spent on providing pleasant and wholesome outdoor activities for communities, such as four-wheel drive courses, firing ranges, drag strips, and water ski jumps. Only when people get out into the great outdoors will they realize how pretty it is and how much they want to protect it with fences and natural areas like golf courses.

ANYway, I hope this helps you all!
posted by Terry at 10:26:00 AM