Brain Tumors Safely Removed on Outpatient Basis
Which can only mean one thing: daytime TV, once a bastion of rent-a-lawyers, psychic hotlines, and exercise product infomercials, will be inundated with ads for brain tumor specialists.

ARE YOU SUFFERING FROM A BRAIN TUMOR!? DON'T HAVE TIME FOR A LENGTHY HOSPITAL STAY!? COME ON DOWN TO BRAINY BOB MD'S DISCOUNT TUMOREMOVER STORE!!! WEAK CREDIT-BAD CREDIT-OR NO CREDIT AT ALL! AND UNLIKE SOME PLACES, [Insert graphic showing big fat greedy doctor smoking a stogie] YOU GET TO TAKE THE TUMOR WITH YOU! YOU ARE GUARANTEED TO HAVE YOUR TUMOR REMOVED THE SAME DAY, OR WE'LL GIVE YOU A TRIP TO DISNEYWORLD! CALL NOW TO SET UP YOUR APPOINTMENT!

(Some restrictions may apply)

[insert clip of young woman pointing to bandaged head--"Brainy Bob MD's Tumoremover Store makes me wish I had TWO-MORE!"]

Of course, Yahoo! will probably go into heavy rotation with pop-ups for AMAZING TINY X-10 WIRELESS TUMOR REMOVAL! And I'll get spammed by Nigerians who want me to invest in walkup tumor removal stands in Lagos, and all I have to do is allow them to transfer $30,000,000 in setup funds from the Abacha Medical Clinic into my bank account for three days.

ACT NOW!
posted by Terry at 4:48:00 PM